This picture was taken the first day we brought the van home and probably the first day in a long time that I had seen a smile from Terence. It was also taken exactly one month after two of our close friends passed away in a car accident.
On this day, I distinctly remember meeting Terence at the car dealership because our ordered Sprinter van had arrived (after ~4 months of waiting). I approached the van and he opened the sliding door with this huge grin on his face, conveniently wearing his “Explore More” shirt. In that moment, he was happy. A happiness I had not seen in a while.
“I don’t know anyone who has been handed only roses. We all encounter hardships. Some we see coming; others take us by surprise…The question is: When these things happen, what do we do next?”
― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy
That summer we really spent our heart and soul into building out the van. In hindsight, building out the van was kind of like therapy to help us cope through the grief – especially for Terence. He dedicated all of his time and attention into the van that summer. It could be therapy in good ways or in bad. Terence has a way of bottling up his feelings so building the van together was not always easy. The grief and anger had its way of showing every once in a while. We had plenty of standard arguments over little things and a lot of “I told you so’s”. But when it was finished, it was an amazing feeling. I marvel everytime I look at our finished product and think “I can’t believe we built that”.
We had always talked about taking this road trip and putting our working lives on pause. But this decision was not made without quite a bit of hesitation. How are we going to make money? What about health insurance? For myself, I was even more inspired to discover more meaning in life. Losing a loved one is a painful reminder that life is short. It took a while, but Terence and I decided we would leave California the place we were born and grew up to and take the time to experience life together and enjoy the beauty of what North America has to offer us.
We lived in the van for approximately six months while working before we started our road trip. We gave up our Bay Area peninsula apartment, sold/donated most of our possessions, stored some items in our parents house, and saved >$11K (rent money) before we started our trip.
A couple of days before my last day at work, I got a fortune that said: “As soon as you feel too old to do a thing, do it.” We are currently six months into our trip and this life decision is definitely one I do NOT regret.
-nicole
